How Fear of Criticism is Holding You Back
One of the biggest reasons our genius hides from us is fear of criticism. We are afraid of what others will think of us if we show who we really are, how we really feel, and what we really believe.
This is natural. Our genius includes our most vulnerable parts. It’s who we are at our core. It’s our specialized wisdom and magic that some people may not understand and some may judge as outright crazy or wrong.
If you’ve struggled with critics in your life – a critical parent, a harsh sibling, a bullying boss, a disapproving spouse – chances are you’ve developed great skills to AVOID criticism. And so now you have a habit of WITHHOLDING your ideas, your preferences, and who you really are. It’s safe that way, right? Keep a lid on it and no one can criticize you! Problem is, if you’re now wanting to know what your genius is, what you most desire and love to do in the world – you’re hiding even from yourself!
So what can you do?
Every healing always begins with AWARENESS. You can’t fix something unless you know it’s broken. So your first step is to NOTICE: Do you have a hard time in your daily life making decisions or knowing or sharing your preferences? Do you tell other people they can choose for you? If yes, this is a sign you don’t give yourself permission to do what you really desire and be who you really are.
This isn’t BAD or WRONG – so don’t get all judgy on yourself! This is simply your smart critic-repellant strategy that has worked for you for a long time, but now is getting in your way. And after you begin to notice for awhile that you are not allowing yourself to have your preferences – you take the second step and begin to ask yourself: What do I really want? Do I want the English Muffin or the Bagel? Do I want to go to a different restaurant altogether? Do I want my best friend to cook me her special dish? If I could open this up to my wildest desires, what would they be?
You DO have preferences.
You’ve simply been afraid to express them. And so by doing this practice in your life of asking yourself what you want with the little things, you begin to open up the permission to be who you are and want what you want. And surprise, surprise! With a little time, this becomes your new normal.You begin to accept and embrace who you are, and your genius begins to see that it’s safe to come out and show itself to you!
It’s genius, really.